WELLBEING: Being perfect
Being a victim of your own perfection
Thinking you have to be perfect...
You may recall a time when your parents or someone of influence told you your grades had to be perfect or you wouldn't be good enough for whatever it is they, or you, wanted for your life.
Remember this: Real life isn't like that
Of course, there are the perfect people you come across, who you compare yourself to, and feel a failure at every comparison. But there are also those who are not perfect at what they do, say or how they present themselves, however, they still get through and achieve their goals.
The way to overcome this battle is to understand you are not a robot.
You are a human being
Human beings are imperfect. Even according to the Christian Bible everyone is a sinner!
And to think, even the most beautiful Supermodel in the world has imperfections, ones they hide under make-up that's taken hours to perfect.
When you begin a project - like writing your book - instead of making every sentence perfect, just get writing.
Let the words flow.
It doesn't matter if it makes no sense whatsoever, just say to yourself
"This is an exercise in forming words on the page. No one will see it, this part is not going to be published."
Trying to be perfect all the time is tiring. It wears you out. It drains you. At some point you begin to realise you are only harming yourself.
Instead, begin to realise you are fine, just the way you are.
It really doesn't matter what other people think of you. If it isn't good enough for them, then don't give it to them in future. Either that, or ask them to explain specifically, why it isn't good enough. Ask them how they would like it to be improved. Ask them to detail those steps and then set-out to achieve those (small) goals they have given you.
You don't have to follow their suggestions. You merely have to use it as an exercise to figure out how they perceive you and your place in their world.
Yes, their world.
Wanting to be perfect is a trait within you. It comes from an emotional fear of not being good enough. Ask youself this one question;
"Who am I not good enough for?"
Then decide for yourself if, instead, you want to be good enough for yourself.
What would you like?
Life is filled with challenges. Life can be either like a rollercoaster or a merry-go-round The one thing that people learn from life is that you have choices to make.
Choices can make you bitter or better
The key takeaways from these challenges you face to be perfect, are that you must learn to be kinder to yourself.
When we travel through this thing called life, the choices we make are ones that help us to harm ourselves through being unkind to ourselves, or by healing.
Healing is always a better option.
You can heal yourself by starting to be kinder to yourself. That means being kinder to your body, emotions and, most importantly, the spirit inside you.
All of these can lead to a healthier, and more balanced, you.
All the best,
Please note, if you buy anything from the links provided, I will earn a smidgen of a commission - and I mean a smidgen (like 0.0001p for any product that takes your fancy enough for you to press the buy button). But at least it's something. And, please know that none of those funds are paid by you, the buyer.
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Kaye is a freelance publisher, author and certified psychotherapist with over three decades of experience. She is also a writer for various blogs about writing, publishing, travelling and health care.
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