• kaye bewley

The Perfect Van for Me?

Updated: Oct 4, 2020

My heart lept! Did I? It was a long drive, but I thought I might be worth the trip.

I did think about putting in an offer to the Somerset guy, and I said:

“If you can get a habitation check and I’ll get the AA to do a mechanical check, then if it passes you'll have yourself a deal. But... I just want you to know that I am driving to Oxford to see another van.”

Then I drove all the way from Somerset to Oxford.

I wasn’t expecting much. In fact, all throughout the journey I kept thinking of turning back and buying the Somerset van. No offers, no messing. Just buy it and see.

Plus, it was difficult to find Jon's location. My SatNav kept taking me all these weird routes, then I saw on Google that it was only just off the A40. Weird.

Anyway, found it eventually. Asked a really pleasant guy where Unit 13 was, he didn’t know, but knew the man who was there. So, without my prompting, he shot off to go and get him.I saw the man and saw the van - and had a crush on both!

Haha. Nervous all the time. I stupidly kept laughing stupidly. Like some silly school girl who knew no better.


I knew what it was. A crush! A bloody crush! And I thought at the age of 56, I was over them!

My mind kept racing, what on earth would he see in you, Kaye?

  • He was a young (about 40-ish), fit, sporty adrenalin freak. I was lumpy, lazy laid-back old woman who thought picking up a book was exercise enough – and I have the pounds to prove it (weight, not money)

  • He was a practical handy man - and the only thing I knew about 'Handy' was Andy from the telly...

  • He was working for himself and loving it, I was working for some idiotic company and hating it


My raging hormones (which I thought had well and truly done with me - at least a decade before), were marching him up the aisle and into bed and making mad passionate love before I even had any control over my thoughts. Couldn’t stop myself. They kept playing the same film reel over and over and over again.


I thought I’d gotten over this kind of thing. I was all grown up now. Another crush? Please spare me! Why, oh why, oh why?

Anyway, the crush thing didn’t just stop at the man - his van was absolutely beautiful!

Perhaps I should have thought about saying some bad things about it, just to knock a bit off. But I was so overawed by the design and the colour and the cleanliness of it all.

The Perfect Van, from Mr Perfect Man?

Anyway, through the oxytocin raging through my veins, I forced myself to think logically. Forced myself to get my mind (and my body in my mind), off of him and onto the day-to-day practicalities of the van and living in it.

It was beautifully put together, by an expert person who liked to spend hours doing this sort of thing. Having it located just outside of his workshop so it was easy for him to do this kind of thing. Me? I’m going to have to find somewhere to fill up the water tank.

I was worried about one thing, that there was no inverter. I have a laptop that needs to be powered up and 12v isn’t going to cut it - and at around £200-£300, they’re not cheap. Plus, I’ll need to pay someone to install it. It’s also not taxed, so that’s another £250.

So, why oh why didn’t I negotiate on price?

I should have said "I’ll give you £11k for it" then we could have worked our way a satisfying conclusion through a decent, adult-like negotiation process.

But no.

Instead, I said "I'd like to think about it [and - in my mind - get my hormones in order - my thoughts said that, not my mouth, of course] before I make a rash decision"

So, I slept overnight, tossed and turned and fantasised and tossed and turned and... phoned him up the very next morning.

Author’s Bio:

Kaye is a freelance publisher, author and certified psychotherapist with over three decades of experience. She is also a writer for various blogs about writing, publishing, travelling and health care.

Feel free to visit her site, where you can sign-up to follow her on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, LinkedIn and YouTube.

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